On the Run: Feelings I Want to Avoid on the Starting Line
Days until NYCM: 78
Number of eye-rolls from the husband when I bring up marathon training for the one billionth time: I can’t count that high
Running is not my everything, but it does mean a lot to me. It’s that thing I’ve been able to rely upon for years when I need to deal with life, a bad mood, anger, or to hash out something that’s been stuck in my head for days. Assign the words “marathon training run” to my runs and suddenly my brain begins to crack under pressure. And I can’t figure out exactly why.
Half marathon training doesn’t have the same effect. I confidently head out for training runs and enjoy nearly every minute of it. Perhaps, it just the fact that full marathons are 1 billion times more difficult and I’m scared that causes this mental weakness… or maybe I just like torturing myself.
This morning I woke up, threw on some booty shorts, laced up my Brooks and headed out the door for what almost wasn’t a tempo run.
I jogged slowly towards the park as I immediately started to convince myself to just run five easy paced miles instead of the planned tempo work.
I arrived at the end of my warm-up mile and began to hesitantly pick-up the pace. Uncommitted to the pace and the workout, my thought flashed forward to November 4th.
I saw myself standing at the start line on Staten Island disappointed and wishing I had trained harder
I picked up the pace.